UsWeekly Says Kim Kardashian Is Karrying A Boy

June 10, 2015 / Posted by:

Earlier today, UsWeekly released the BREAKING news that “multiple sources” could confirm that the baby living inside Kim Kardashian’s factory-made body is a boy. One of the sources claimed that Kim’s kurrent husband Kanye West was “overjoyed” after finding out his wife was knocked up with a boy, adding that he loves their girl baby North West a whole hell of a lot, but “he wanted a little boy, an heir.” Wait – an “heir“? Let’s all cross our fingers and hope chronic narcissism isn’t hereditary.

Even though UsWeekly has a 50/50 chance of correctly guessing what kind of baby will pop out of Kim’s bouncy castle body in December, Kim still took to Twitter shortly after to swat away all the rumors going around about her pregnancy, including UsWeekly’s baby boy news.


To be fair, I’m not even sure she knows the sex of the baby. How could she? When Kim Kardashian looks at an ultrasound picture, the only thing she’s looking for is what the baby’s best angle might be so she’ll know which side of her body the nannies should place it before their daily pap walk.

Not to mention that we’d already know if Kanye was having a boy, because the US patent office would be backed up with requests to trademark the following names: Kanye West Jr., Kanye 2, Kanye’s Little Kanye, Yeezus Jr., The Second Coming of Kanye, and HA HA HA GOD, I GOT A SON NOW TOO.

And if you’ve ever wondered what a drowsy-in-the-face version of Barbamama would look like, here are some picture of Kim shopping in Beverly Hills yesterday. I know – how DARE I compare Kim to Barbamama.

Pics: Splash,

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