Chet Haze, the aspiring trust fund “rapper” and British hotel-trashing n-word enthusiast who is now trying to go by the name “Chet Hanx” (because he wants to bring even more shame to his family’s name, I guess) told TMZ that he recently got some very good advice from his parents, Tom Hanks and Rita Wilson. According to Chet, mommy and daddy have told their 24-year-old son that it may be time to put down the iPhone they definitely paid for and stop posting every dumb thought that escapes from his brain. Finally – confirmation that Tom Hanks and Rita Wilson are as embarrassed of the shit their son says as the rest of us are.
“My parents, like, they be telling me just to, like, ‘Stay off social media, period’. Like, even before this happened, they would, like, be like, ‘Hey, you know, like, don’t be on Instagram so much.’ But they’re the old generation. They don’t get it. Like, this is the new generation. We do things differently now. You know what I mean? You either gonna get it or you’re not gonna get it.”
If you want to see what it would look like if Forrest Gump had a grandson who was best friends with C-Czar from Kroll Show, here’s the video of Chet’s conversation with TMZ. He also talks about how it’s OK for him to use the n-word, because he identifies with black culture and that it’s an unspoken thing that “white people use that term.” That loud thumping sound you just heard was Tom and Rita banging their heads against their kitchen table.