“Yes? And?” thought Hollywood, before it called up an airbrushed picture of an unborn fetus and informed it that they got the part as Johnny Depp’s girlfriend.
During an interview with The Wrap, 37-year-old Maggie Gyllenhaal confessed that she was recently told she was too damn dusty to play the love interest of a 55-year-old dude and was shown the door. For those of you who are bad at math, that means someone thought an age gap of 18 years wasn’t large enough. Is Hollywood run by gross old men who are taking advice from barely-legal gold diggers? Wait, don’t answer that.
“There are things that are really disappointing about being an actress in Hollywood that surprise me all the time. I’m 37 and I was told recently I was too old to play the lover of a man who was 55. It was astonishing to me. It made me feel bad, and then it made me feel angry, and then it made me laugh.”
In the real world, it’s not weird for a 55-year-old to date a 37-year-old. And 37 is young in regular years! But in Hollywood years, a 37-year-old woman is basically a mummified corpse. Come on Maggie, you’ve been in Hollywood long enough to know the casting breakdown for women based on their ages. Anything 0-17 is a daughter, 18-21 is a girlfriend or fiancé, 22-25 is a wife, 26-35 is an ex-wife, 36-40 is a grandmother, and anything older than that gets witch, scary homeless gypsy woman, or wrinkly old lady watching TV in a nursing home. What am I saying? Even the casting notice for the role of nursing home lady would be like “Yes, she’s at death’s door, but nothing over 51 please.”
And like it even matters how old Maggie Gyllenhaal is? It’s Hollywood! They’ll just end up CGI’ing all the age out of her face anyway.