In case you didn’t hear her clearly enough the last time she said it, Taylor Swift wants you to know that she sheds more tears than her collection of vintage Lost n’ Founds whenever some meany-mo jokes that she’s run through more dudes than a runaway Monster Energy truck in the parking lot of a Nickelback concert.
During an interview with Tavi Gevinson for this month’s issue of ELLE, Taylor – who is serving up Jerrica Benton‘s preppy Pennsylvania cousin in Party City Ziggy Stardust drag on that cover – admits once again that she’s not here for the snarky bitches who joke about her reputation as a perpetually-heartbroken boy-crazy bundle of butterscotch-dipped desperation. While talking about being in the same place as one of her exes for two weeks (London, which means the ex was probably elfin hipster Harry Styles) and not feeling anxious about it, Taylor says:
“The first thought that came to my mind was, I’m finally clean. I’d been in this media hailstorm of people having a very misconstrued perception of who I was. There were really insensitive jokes being made at awards shows by hosts; there were snarky headlines in the press—’Taylor Goes Through a Breakup: Well, That Was Swift!’—focusing on all the wrong things.”
I just pictured a sad-faced Taylor Swift returning home from an awards show, putting on Jann Arden’s “Insensitive“, and slow dancing with one of her pussies while she boo-hoos about Tina Fey and Amy Poehler hurting her feewings. “Gawd Meredith, they act like I’ve dated half of Hollywood! A third maybe, but definitely not half.”
Here’s more of Tay Tay looking like a sexed-up department store mannequin in ELLE: