Night Crumbs
“Four years of Juilliard and here I am pushing this trick around on this stupid ass jet ski” thought the dancer to himself during the opening night of the Butterly Unicorn Rainbow Hello Kitty Empress’ new show in Las Vegas – Lainey Gossip
First we find out that Kylie Jenner lied about her inflated lips and now we’re finding out that Tom Brady lied about his deflated balls! WHAT IS TRUE ANYMORE? – Celebitchy
Marisa Miller’s knocked up ass got naked for PETA – Drunken Stepfather
You in danger, Kenya Moore, because the Original Aunt Viv is not and never will be the one – Reality Tea
The most famous dude that Andy Cohen has ever boned is Lance Bass. And if Lance Bass is the most famous dude that Andy Cohen has boned, then Lance Bass is probably the only famous dude that Andy Cohen has boned – Towleroad
Samuel L. Jackson, Jennifer Jason Leigh and Kurt Russell are on the cover of Entertainment Weekly as their Hateful Eight characters and you can clearly see them saying, “Yes, Quentin Tarantino has asked to suck my toes and that’s all I want to say about that,” with their terrified eyes – IDLYITW
Terrence Howard, the douche obsessed with baby wipes, may have a baby-sized peen – The Superficial
In “sometimes OUTRAGE happens outside of the internet” news, locals are pissed that a monkey in Japan was named after Princess Charlotte – Jezebel
Heidi Montag’s face looks like this now – Hollywood Tuna
Jessica Chastina’s dress would look better covered over a Calico Corners ottoman – Popoholic
You’re doing the #KylieJennerChallenge wrong – The Berry
Shaq goes down – OMG Blog
The Sony Hack might’ve been a good thing for Jennifer Lawrence’s checking account – Pajiba
I really hope that the Banger Sisters make a cameo in Meryl Streep’s new movie – SOW
Joey Gladstone’s Fuller House deal finally came through. No word yet on Mr. Bear’s deal – HuffPo
Holly Montag still exists, is a mom now – ICYDK
Dearest Bradley Cooper, the next time you co-star in a staged kissing photo-op with your new piece, please tell the pap to take clearer pictures. This mess looks like it was taken with a View-Master – Just Jared
Tina Knowles writes a Mother’s Day note to Beyonce and Basement Baby, but she forgot to include the part where she thanks King Bey for all the MONAAAAAY – Popsugar
Pic: Splash