Hot Slut Of The Day!
Carl Moore, supreme defender of chihuahuas!
If it wasn’t for 73-year-old chihuahua-saving badass motherfucker Carl Moore, Lacey the chihuahua might’ve been at the gates of heaven, checking “got my ass mauled by a bear” next to the section “reason for checking in” on the entrance form. Fuck Mayweather and fuck Pacquiao! The real boxing star of the week, month and year is Carl Moore.
The former boxer and ex-marine tells CBS13 in Sacramento that recently, a gigantic bear has been trolling for chicken on his property in the Meadow Vista area in North California. (A bear trolling for chicken. Is that you, John Travolta?) The bear has snatched up and eaten a few of his chickens. Well, the other day the bear came back and decided to leave the chickens alone and come for the dogs. The 300-pound, 5 ½-foot tall bear stomped onto the porch, which caused Lacey the chihuahua to go crazy. The other dog, a 15-year-old lab, didn’t move or bark, so let’s just call them Princess I Don’t Give A Fuck.
When Carl saw the bear screwing with Lacey, he ran out and raised his arms while cursing that trespasser out. For some reason, that bear didn’t get the memo about Carl being the leader of Sacramento’s Not The One Club and stood on its hind legs. Carl knows a threat when he sees one and he’s not going to let some bear threaten him on his property, so he used his boxing skills to Haymaker that bear in the face. I’ll let Pepaw Ali tell the story, because he is a chihuahua-protecting jewel and philosopher.
“The man or beast that I run from ain’t been born and its mama’s already dead.” That legend is a gift to humanity and chihuahua-ty!
Carl’s friend saw the whole thing go down, so he can testify that it’s not some made-up folk tale. I believe him, because if you look into Lacey’s eyes in that clip, you can clearly see her saying, “That’s right, don’t fuck with my daddy, bitches!”
Somebody better make a sweeping cinematic epic about this event. William H. Macy, call your agent now!
Pic: Gold Country Media