BREAKING: Miley Cyrus Dyed Her Pit And Poon Fur

May 1, 2015 / Posted by:

In case you were wondering what the hillbilly chipmunk did for attention today, here’s your answer whether you like it or not.

Seen above looking like an extra stoned Macauley Culkin in drag as a 90s era Ani Di Franco at a candy rave,  Miley Cyrus took a quick break from turning her body into a living museum for tragic tattoos and spent a piece of her Friday slathering pink dye all over her armpit hair and crotch bush. I barely see any pit hair. That shit looks like a rug burn or a rash. She should’ve added some pink pit weave pieces to really make it luscious.

I’m much more old-fashioned and a little more retro than Miley. I prefer to braid my pit hair and decorate it with gold micro beads. And I prefer to part my pubes in the middle like it’s the hair on the head of an old-timey gentleman.

Miley posted a picture of the finished look on Instagram and I put the full picture after the cut, because I have no idea if a peek of pink pussy hair is NSFW or not.

mileycyruspitsandpubes2

And now that I’ve stared at Miley’s cotton candy coochie for a good 15 seconds, I’m going to need to dunk my head into a bowl of something mind-numbing. Happy Friday!

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