Dr. Oz has been doing the damage control shuffle hard this week after a group of doctors sent a letter to Columbia University, calling for him to be dropped from the faculty, because he’s full of banana-shaped shits and would gladly tell his disciples that Coke is a miracle weight-loss elixir if Coca-Cola gave him a big enough check. The group basically said that he’s the Wizard of Oz with a medical license. They slammed his ass for shitting on GMOs, turning his nose up at “evidence-based medicine” and promoting “quick treatments” for money. Well, Dr. Oz has greased up his face with Crisco (Vaseline lost the bidding war to be his fightin’ lube of choice) and stuck Gillette razors (yup, they won the bidding war against Schick) in his hair, because he’s fighting back.
Dr. Oz was on Today this morning where he said that the doctors coming for him have an agenda (it’s been reported that some of the doctors are connected to Monsanto) and that he doesn’t consider his show a medical show. That’s why the “doctor” is so small in his logo. (Not in all logos, apparently. See: logo above) Dr. Oz also said that his show will survive if other doctors continue to slap at him and say that he’s doing more harm than good. Dr. Oz told Matt Lauer that he has only one regret and that’s using the word “miracle” to describe weight-loss supplements. via People
“‘Doctor’ is actually up in the little bar for a reason,” he said, adding that the series is a way of informing people of what’s happening in the world of medicine without bombarding them with information they don’t need or won’t understand. “People don’t want to sit there and be hounded with information,” he said, later adding, “I hear from viewers and doctors all the time about how we’ve helped make that conversation easier.”
He went on to add that the series is committed to finding “high-tech and low-tech solutions” to the problems that ail people today. “We’ve got a wonderful medical unit … but we have to go beyond that,” he said, saying that the show may sometimes explore the power of prayer or other such unconventional cures.
Yesterday, USA Today posted an op-ed piece from 8 members of Columbia’s faculty who think that Dr. Oz’s show does perform a public service by talking about alternative therapies, but they also think that this disclaimer should pop up before every episode: “The opinions expressed on this program may not be evidence-based or part of accepted medical practice and have no endorsement from Columbia University.”
As I’ve said a million times before, my mom is a major Dr. Oz fan mom and although she doesn’t totally believe in everything he says, she will knife a bitch who talks major shit about him. That’s why I keep a suit of armor in her spare bedroom closet. Whenever I’m at her house and she’s watching Dr. Oz, I have to put on that suit of armor so I can safely talk shit about him in front of her. Since my mom is an Ozhead, she’d probably agree with him about his show not being a medical show. It’s not a medical show. It’s CHURCH!
But really, if it’s not a medical show, why doesn’t he just drop the “Dr” in the title and call it Oz? Oh wait, there was a show called Oz and that was a show that really worked medical miracles, because every time I saw Christopher Meloni’s muscled-up ass bounce up and down all my ailments went away.