Hot Slut Of The Day!

This incredibly beautiful music video for The Hoff’s masterpiece of a song “True Survivor.”

Kung Fury is a highly-anticipated (emphasis on HIGH) Swedish martial arts short movie that was funded through Kickstarter and is about a detective who tries to time travel from the 80s to World War II times to kill Hitler, but fucks up and ends up in the Viking times. None of that plot really makes sense and when the plot doesn’t make sense, you of course get The Hoff to do a song for the soundtrack.

Nearly every piece of Germany is probably covered in jizz (FYI: Jizz in German is “jïzz“) today, because every German busted out a fountain of orgasms while watching this stunning piece of cinematic art that has everything you need in a music video from ultra dramatic smoke to neon lasers to The Hoff’s spongy mullet to dinosaurs to viking chicks. This video is a crash course in world history, paleontology, glamour and fashion! I fully expect the producers of the new Jurassic Park movie to announce that they’ve decided to scrap that shit, because why bother releasing it when a way hotter dinosaur movie is coming out.

Hold onto your desk, because you’ll tip when The Hoff does the splits and you’ll completely fall out when he drops to his knees and oozes raw emotion.

This video is the only thing they should teach in history class, because it’s the only thing the children need to know.