Nobody has ever set fire to the grounds of Coachella the way that Leonardo DiCatchAHo did when he delivered some “middle-aged dad doing Zumba while high on meth” during MGMT’s set last year, but Robert Pattinson still tried to out-dork Leo in the moves department on Sunday night.
One of the prices a multi-millionaire movie star may have to pay for being a multi-millionaire movie star is that a stranger will record him awkwardly swaying and bopping to Drake at Coachella. While his fiancee FKA Twigs gracefully moved like a blissed out nymph at a seance, RPattz moved like a sumo wrestler bobble head figure doing a lazy version of the Humpty Dance. The beat got a hold of RPattz’s shoulders and shook him until he looked like a dry heaving turtle. (Hmmm, on that note, maybe he just watched Madonna suck the life force out of Drake.)
Here’s another one for your “White Dudes Dancing To Hip Hop” file.
He looks like a haughty video game villain cackling while watching his minions attack his enemy. But I can’t totally laugh at his dork moves, because if that was me, that video would’ve ended much differently. It would’ve ended with a paramedic trying to do the Heimlich maneuver on me, because when I dance to hip hop while vaping, I look like a fucked up orangutan choking on a carrot stick.
And here’s some pictures of RPattz at Coachella over the weekend. The computer lab screens in the Twihard ward of every mental hospital are probably covered in saliva, because you know those hardcore Twihards licked the moist spot on RPattz’s pit.