Surprise! Bobby Flay’s Divorce Is Starting To Get Weird

Well, that was fast. One day after it was announced that smug-faced leprechaun chef Bobby Flay and SVU OG Stephanie March were quitting each other after 10 years of marriage, TMZ says Bobby Flay decided to haul ass to the courthouse and file for divorce, and it might have something to do with their prenup. Apparently Stephanie March isn’t happy with the prenup she signed back in 2005 when they got married, and they’ve already started fighting over property. TMZ says Bobby Flay was already pretty rich when they first got together, and the prenup reflects that. So their divorce might come down to Stephanie trying to get money while Bobby tries to keep money. They don’t have any kids together, so there will be no messy custody fight.

To make matters messier, the NYDN says that one of the reasons Bobby and Stephanie marriage dried up worse than a flank steak left in the oven too long was the frozen cauliflower version of Angelina Jolie, January Jones. An insider (a shifty-eyed Giada trying to divert attention away from herself) says that things haven’t been great ever since Stephanie found a frozen spermcicle on the tip of Bobby’s freckled dick and accused him of sticking it in January’s ice queen cooch. The insider claims he denied that anything shady ever happened with January Jones.

If Beat Bobby Flay has taught me anything, it’s that Bobby Flay can be a real asshole when he wants to win something. So if Stephanie March wants to get her hands on any of that sweet Food Network cash, she knows who to call: her replacement, Assistant District Attorney Casey Novak! Casey gets shit done.