Damn Showtime, we wanted to get the original gang back together, but not like this! Last Sunday, legendary sexy weirdo (don’t judge me) David Lynch announced that he was quitting Showtime’s nine-episode Twin Peaks reboot because they wanted to do it on the cheap and he wasn’t feeling it. Most of us shot a set of “Is money THAT tight?” stink eyes at Showtime and braced ourselves for a low-budget television mess. It looks like most of the original cast of Twin Peaks feels the same, so they made a little video to swat at Showtime for letting David Lynch walk out, while also sort of letting them know they don’t really want anything to do with the Twin Peaks reboot if he’s not involved.
I know this video should make me feel sad that a Twin Peaks reboot might not ever happen, but I’m just so excited that all my Twin Peaks pals again! Laura Palmer! Norma Jennings! Mike Nelson! (who can still totally get it). THE LOG LADY! You hear that Showtime? You’ve made the Log Lady sad. Shame on you. But if there’s any silver lining to this video, it’s that we learned Sherilyn Fenn is a damn poet. “…like eyes without brows.” Truer words have never been spoken.
Speaking of sad, why was there no hot dragged-up David Duchovny??? Maybe he couldn’t find his Denise wig in time. Or maybe it was because he didn’t want to do anything to piss off his old Californication bosses at Showtime. You don’t EVER want to fuck with the person signing your residual checks.