Sad news for those of you who have spent the past four months on your knees praying to St. Hollywood that Idris Elba would be chosen as the next James Bond, because according to Idris Elba, it’s probably not going to happen. And the reason it’s not going to happen is because we wanted it too much. Originally, Idris Elba was laughing off the rumor, but during a conversation with London’s British Film Institute (via THR) yesterday, he made it clear that we’ve got a better chance of seeing a Kardashian with a deflated ass than seeing Idris Elba as Bond:
“Honestly, it’s a rumor that’s really starting to eat itself. If there was ever any chance of me getting Bond, it’s gone.”
No! Say it ain’t so, Luther! Unless I hear it from Mr. Bond himself (I don’t know anything about James Bond, but that sounds sort of right to me), I refuse to believe the dream is dead. I don’t want to live in a world that would deny us the chance to see Idris Elba stroll out of the ocean in a pair of junk-hugging short shorts or lighting panties on fire with the sight of him in a red diaper and thigh-high boots. Yes, I know that’s Zardoz, but my mind chooses to believe that just like former James Bond Sean Connery, Idris Elba would also choose to follow up his role as 007 with some sexy sci-fi future fuckery. Is it too much to ask for a half-naked Idris Elba? Just let me have this Hollywood! Come on, I saw The World Is Not Enough twice – I think I deserve this.