In case you were wondering how things were going between Robin Wright and her younger ginger fuck piece turned on-again/off-again fiance Ben Foster, things are apparently very good. If I was a classy type, this would be where I would give a coy wink, but I’m not, so this is where I crudely jab you in the ribs and say “She’s eyeball deep in dick, if I ain’t being too subtle” before making the penis-into-hole motion with my fingers. During a recent interview with Vanity Fair, Robin admitted that Ben is doing her right in all aspects of her life, including the one that involves her yelling till the paint peels off the walls:
“I’ve never been happier in my life than I am today. Perhaps it’s not ladylike [to say], but I’ve never laughed more, read more, or come more than with Ben.”
I just pictured an out-of-breath Robin with a tally counter in her hand screaming “We hit zero again!” My only question (well, besides whether or not Ben teaches a night school class on his technique) is when the hell do they have time for all that coming and reading? If I could do both, I would, but I am a very busy person and I have to prioritize, which is why I gave up reading and no talk good no more.
She also went on to say that, unlike her ex-husband Sean Penn, she’s not interested in shitting on their marriage:
“I’m not in the business of talking about what ‘isn’t’. My eyes are set forward and I’ve never been happier. I have too much respect for Sean and our two extraordinary children to sell our past joys and woes for public consumption and fodder. I believe we were together not only to have our beautiful children but to learn how to love … for the next time around, the right way.”
That’s too bad, because I would love to hear her elaborate on why she’s coming more with Ben than she was with Sean Penn. I’m guessing it has something to do with the fact that you’ll always have 100% more orgasms when there’s a 0% chance of looking down at your pussy area and seeing Sean Penn’s corroded exhaust pipe face covered in cooch juice staring back at you.