John Mayer Is Done Talking About The John Mayer/Taylor Swift Drama

March 9, 2015 / Posted by:

There have been at least 200 bitchy glitter pen entries since the John Mayer chapter of Taylor Swift’s Burn Book, but according to John Mayer, people still want to poke their long-dead relationship with a stick and he’s over it all. During a recent interview with MSNBC (via UsWeekly), question asker Ronan Farrow sort of tip-toed around Tay Tay’s name, as one does when they want to talk about Tay Tay so as not to invoke her butterscotch wrath. But John Mayer clearly wasn’t having the perpetual middle school drama of it all and came right out with the following:

“We have to be able to talk about Taylor Swift professionally.”

The Vinegar Prince then brought up his song “Paper Doll“, aka John Mayer’s version of a Taylor Swift break-up song from 2 years ago that was totally written about either Taylor Swift or Barbie, and took a swipe at the gossip telling types who thought it was a swipe at Tay Tay:

“The song never got listened to as a song. It became a news story because of the lyrics. I’m not in the business of telling people what the song’s about. Now I can just go, ‘Look, I can say the name Taylor Swift.’ She’s an artist. I’m an artist. Everybody stop, nobody’s got cancer. We’re rich people who get to live out our dreams. Let’s just stop it. I’m a musician who’s bigger than one song or one record.”

He then drags Kanye West into it by saying he doesn’t care that he’s not eating his lunch with the rich kids at the popular table in the cafeteria anymore:

“Nothing bothers me anymore. There are going to be times when I make music as popular or empirically valuable as [Swift’s] in terms of making pop music that won’t sell as many copies and I’m fine with that. Look, if I save a baby from a burning building and Kanye [West] saves a baby from a burning building, Kanye’s going to get more Google News hits. And I’m fine with it.”

But because he’s still wants an invite to Tay Tay’s next boy/girl makeout party, he also congratulates her on fighting the good fight by yanking her entire collection of karaoke tunes off Spotify:

“Artists need the person with the loudest voice to speak for them. You can go to the Met Ball. That’s great. That’s a great way to use your voice is to go ‘I’m wearing Valentino.’ Or you can use your voice to give things.”

So let me get this middle school drama straight: first Tay Tay holds a press conference in the gymnasium during cheer practice to announce that she’s done talking shit about Katy Perry, then John Mayer meets with all the other dirtbags in the poorest ventilated corner of the woodworking shop to say that he’s done talking shit about Taylor Swift. What’s next? Katy Perry gathering all the other wannabe goth kids in the art department dark room to announce she’s dumping that douchebag Judas John Mayer? Or maybe she find a way to work it into her yearbook quote instead.

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