Libor Jany of the Minneapolis Star Tribune went deep into the archives and found and tweeted this picture of Prince serving up some smirk in his junior high school basketball picture. That glorious afro weighs more than him and I bet he still owned the game.
Before becoming the human form of a unicorn’s horn, Prince was a member of the Bryant Junior High School basketball team and his old coach said he was a really good player. Prince is about as tall as a Calla Lilly’s yellow dick (or whatever that part is called) so I can’t even imagine him playing basketball.
But seriously, I believe his coach. Not only was Prince a great player, but he was probably the best player that ever existed at Bryant Junior High School and beyond. Although, I think his coach got a few things wrong and forgot some shit. Because I’m sure Prince won every game for his team without having to dribble or throw that ball. At the start of every quarter, Prince would throw a side-eye at his opponents and they’d immediately pass out on the court from being hit with that much attitude. Then his teammates would stack those passed-out bodies like stairs and Prince would stomp on up to the hoop and gracefully drop in the ball before throwing his head over his shoulder and letting out a pout. GAME: BLOUSES.