Madge performed “Living For Love” at the Brit Awards in London tonight and it was a major hit. What I mean by that is, she hit the fucking floor. Bitch got cape snatched! I’m truly surprised that the planet didn’t split in two as soon she hit that stage like a lightning bolt. It looks like she didn’t finish undoing her cape by the time that Minotaur yanked it, but still. Everybody is to blame for this. Even Obama better watch out. She got up and finished the number. Madge’s current boy toy better get the cauldron, goat’s heads and virgin period blood ready, because she’s going to cast a black magical spell on bitches left and right tonight.
Madge’s tumble is at around the 1:00 mark:
UPDATE: Madge said on Instagram that she’s alive and that she couldn’t get her cape off in time.
Armani hooked me up! My beautiful cape was tied too tight! But nothing can stop me and love really lifted me up! Thanks for your good wishes! I’m fine!
Cut to tomorrow morning’s headlines: Giorgio Armani Missing!