If you know anyone who works at Webster’s, do them a favor and send some dinner over to their office tonight; I have a feeling they’re going to be putting in some extra hours after this story broke and they were forced to rewrite the definition of the word random. Humanoid chicken nugget/donkey sauce enthusiast/professional diarrhea maker Guy Fieri must have finally overcome his crippling fear of gay people, because this weekend he decided to marry a bunch of them in Florida.
Page Six says that Guy Fieri performed 101 same-sex wedding ceremonies during the annual South Beach Wine & Food Festival in Miami this weekend. Guy’s friend and fellow chef Art Smith (referring to Guy as a ‘chef’ might have been the most offensive thing I’ve ever written on this site, BTW) announced shortly after same-sex marriage became legal in Florida back in January that the first 101 same-sex couples to tweet the hashtag #101gayweddings would get married en masse at the The James Royal Palm hotel in Miami.
I don’t know if Art Smith also mentioned that the person doing the dearly beloveds would be the mistake baby of Joey Fatone and a box of Clairol Frost & Tip, but I would assume not, since he probably didn’t want a bunch of people responding to his contest with the hashtag #thanksbutnothanks. And for those of you wondering why Guy Fieri officiated the 101 weddings, Page Six says it was to honor the memory of his late sister, who was a lesbian.
And to explain that picture above, Guy Fieri was joined by Duff Goldman, who made the wedding cake, and Ted Allen, who was there because Ted Allen is awesome and should be invited to everything.
I know it’s random as hell, but it sort of makes sense that Guy Fieri is an ordained minister. He’s been bringing people and toilets together for years, so it’s about time he branched out and started bringing people together with other people.