Hot Slut Of The Day!
Ophelia (as played by former HSOTD Cicely Tyson), Annalise’s mother, a founding member of the Not The One Club, from last night’s episode of How To Get Away With Murder.
On How To Get Away With Murder last night, we learned how to get away with being a truth bomb-throwing bad ass. The answer: Be Cicely Tyson as Ophelia! Annalise’s mother swept into her life on last night’s episode to pull her from her puddle of pity and force feed her several heaping servings of extra chunky truth. Ophelia may look like a sweet old lady whose got pockets full of Werther’s Originals and butterscotch hard candies in her JCPenney cardigan, but the only thing she’s got in her pockets is a whole lot of truth-covered wisdom.
I won’t spit out any major spoilers, because whenever I give even a hint of a spoiler, I get digitally kneed in the teeth through email. The next time I get one of those emails, I’m going to read it in the voice of Ophelia. But I will spit out a few quotes that leapt out of Ophelia’s mouth and took me higher:
What she said when she showed up to Annalise’s home/office and was greeted by Bonnie, one of her daughter’s employees, who didn’t know who she was. Bonnie seriously needs to enroll in the University of Ophelia: “Don’t you recognize a VIP when you see one? Your boss came out of my V and her daddy’s P.”
What she said when Annalise needed to be knocked down to earth: “What the hell are you talking about? ‘Respect the fact’ and ‘Honor your request’? Who the hell do you think you are? Oprah? I wiped your ass and I’ll call you anything I want.”
What she said when Annalise told her that her name is Annalise: “Your name is Anna Mae, something else your mama gave you from the poor box.”
And these words to live by: “Sometimes, you gotta do what you gotta do, even if all you got is a long match and a very flammable hooch.”
Can somebody please give Ophelia directions to the homes of Kanye West and Justin Bieber?
And Cecily Tyson is 81 years old. If the makers of movies want to do something right FOR ONCE, they’d fast track a remake of Thelma & Louise starring Cecily Tyson and Betty White.