Xtina’s Baby Is Really Excited To Be On The Cover Of People Magazine

February 11, 2015 / Posted by:

I didn’t know Anne Geddes was a People Magazine photographer.

Christina Aguilera is an old-fashioned kind of famous trick. She’s not going to put pictures of her new baby’s face on Instagram for free, because that’s bougie and doesn’t make sense IN THIS ECONOMY.  Xtina has makeup artist bills and allowances (read: her fiance’s) to pay, so she put her baby to work and is going to get that $$$. Xtina’s second child was pulled out of her bronzer-covered womb all the way back in August, but she’s promoting the new season of The Voice so right now is the best time for her to get some promo.

Summer Rain is making a Reddit Hawk face. Either she’s really excited to learn all the details about Johnny & Amber’s island wedding or this is the exact moment when her mother whispered the words, “Your government name really is Summer Rain,” into her ear and she said “WUT?” to herself before crying over the foolery of it all.

People not only got pictures from Xtina (you can see another not as ‘Shopped picture here), but they also got words from her too:

On meeting Summer Rain for the first time: “I was speechless. She was literally like an angel … We had an immediate calm bond, and I felt unexplainably connected to her and her spirit.”

On how she’s saving money on electricity bills because Summer Rain’s smile is like a light bulb: “Her smile lights up a room and I know it melts mama and daddy’s hearts. She laughs a ton and is easy to make smile. She just wants to be where the action is!”

On doing The Voice and being a mom at the same time: “It’s definitely not easy juggling work and motherhood, as being a parent is a full-time job within itself. You just have to make it work for you. My life has so many different moving parts, but my kids are the center focal piece, and everything else shifts around them.”

I get that Xtina is one of the vanguards of the Photoshop movement and is usually Photoshopped into another dimension, but Photoshopping a baby? They Photoshopped that child so much that it almost looks like Summer Rain couldn’t make the shoot so they used the most famous star in Hollywood, the American Sniper baby, instead. What’s next? Celebrities Photoshopping the ultrasound pics of their fetus before posting it on Instagram? (“Why didn’t I think of that?!” – Kim Kartrashian)

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