NBC News Has Suspended Brian Williams For 6 Months Without Pay

February 10, 2015 / Posted by:

If this news saddens you, please dry your tears on Brian Williams’ bulge. But who knows if that’s really an all-natural organic bulge. It could be a pile of shameless lies!!!!!!

Over the weekend, Brian Williams said that he’s taking some time away from NBC News, because he has become the story after he got caught lying about getting hit with RPG fire in Iraq in 2003. Since then the media has dug up more possible lies (including that puppy story, which I’ll never forgive him for) and NBC News has started investigating shit he’s claimed. Brian Williams was only supposed to be away a few days, but today NBC News announced that they’re putting him on a six month suspension without pay while they investigate. He reportedly earns $10 million a year, so he’s out $5 million. Here’s a piece of the memo from NBC News president Deborah Turness (you can read the full memo here if you want to):

We have decided today to suspend Brian Williams as Managing Editor and Anchor of NBC Nightly News for six months. The suspension will be without pay and is effective immediately. We let Brian know of our decision earlier today. Lester Holt will continue to substitute Anchor the NBC Nightly News.

Our review, which is being led by Richard Esposito working closely with NBCUniversal General Counsel Kim Harris, is ongoing, but I think it is important to take you through our thought process in coming to this decision.

While on Nightly News on Friday, January 30, 2015, Brian misrepresented events which occurred while he was covering the Iraq War in 2003. It then became clear that on other occasions Brian had done the same while telling that story in other venues. This was wrong and completely inappropriate for someone in Brian’s position.

In addition, we have concerns about comments that occurred outside NBC News while Brian was talking about his experiences in the field.

As Managing Editor and Anchor of Nightly News, Brian has a responsibility to be truthful and to uphold the high standards of the news division at all times.

But what will happen to Allison Williams’ career? Does this mean that Marnie will die in a freak ass eating accident on Girls as reparations?

I wouldn’t be surprised if that 6 months turns into forever and NBC is going to use the time to try out possible replacements. Or maybe they’re stalling for Brian’s real replacement who isn’t available until later this year. I wonder who that could be? But whatever, Brian Williams doesn’t need that shit anyway. He can focus on his hot rap career now! Oh wait…

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