In honor of the Grammy awards on Sunday night, Jimmy Kimmel Live! had their second all-musician edition of celebrities reading mean tweets about themselves. Included in this round was Iggy Azalea (who got read by some random trick for having a mole-covered face, which is probably one of the nicer things people have tweeted about Igloo Australia), Sweet Dee’s dream boyfriend Josh Groban, and come-to-life $9.99 Valentine’s Day talking teddy bear, Drake, who was dragged by someone named @MmmKandiYamz for looking like Voldemort with hair. Poor Wheelchair Jimmy; to quote Bart Simpson, you can actually pinpoint the second when his hear rips in half.
In case you’ve forgotten, Voldemort is the evil dude from Harry Potter who looks like an albino turtle sperm. I see it. But is that really mean? Voldemort with hair is pretty much just Ralph Fiennes, and Ralph Fiennes is a fox, so Wheelchair Jimmy should take that as a compliment. Besides, you can’t trust the judgement of someone who chose to name their Twitter after the grossest Thanksgiving side dish (I don’t care how many marshmallows you put on it, candied yams are disgusting).
But the best might be Ariana Grande Latte, who read the words “I’d rather listen to an auto-tuned queef played on a continuous loop than listen to Ariana Grande’s new album.” Um, wouldn’t we all? That sounds like a great song.