Being a gracious loser is so overrated and life’s too short to not snatch a crown right off of a trick’s head. The runner-up of Miss Amazonas 2015 knows what I’m talking about and when she lost the main prize on Friday in Brazil, she won the title of Miss Fuck It 2015 when she yanked the crown off of the winner’s head.
The Guardian says that when Carol Toledo won the title of Miss Amazonas 2015, the other beauty queens put on manufactured smiles and pretended to be happy, but not the runner-up Sheislane Hayalla (that’s Portuguese for “Stay in your lane, bitch“). Sheislane hugged Carol at first, but then she couldn’t resist the urge to show those judges that she’s the real winner by displaying grace and elegance. After Carol Toledo was crowned, Sheislane Hayalla pulled her crown off, threw it on the floor and sashayed away while screaming something in Portuguese as the contestant in yellow clapped for her. I like that queen in yellow. She is the kind of friend who will hold your purse when you need to fight a bitch and fix your lipstick for you afterward.
Sheislane later apologized in a video and on Facebook, but said she didn’t regret crown-snatching a trick, because she wanted to show everyone that money shouldn’t be able to buy you everything. Sheislane believes Carol’s win was bought.
“I wanted to express my disapproval of the actions in the preparations for Miss Amazonas 2015. I do not regret having protested. I believe I have planted change in this great contest. I wanted something clean and honest.”
Well, Sheislane could be removed as runner-up and Carol is going on to represent her state in the Miss Brazil pageant, so I don’t know what kind of change she’s talking about. Maybe she means that next year pageant officials will Super Glue that crown onto the head of the chick who bought it so her rival can’t rip it off. I do love a good crown-snatching and I want to slow clap while giving Sheislane a standing ovation, but I can’t. That was some sloppy work. She really should’ve trained with Miss Wig Snatcher Brazil 2009. When you snatch a trick’s crown, you need to silently creep up on her like a ninja and snatch that tiara and her hair in one swoop before disappearing into the darkness.
YES! That is how it’s done. Scalp that bitch and leave her practically bald.