Ben Foster (seen above giving me douchebag bouncer at a sports bar in Kips Bay) and Robin Wright broke off their engagement to each other last November, because their 14 year age difference became a problem and she felt like he was just way too immature for her ass. That’s what a source told UsWeekly at the time anyway. Well, I guess in the quick minute they were broken up, Ben injected Lindsay Lohan’s blood into his body to speed up his age by 14 years and now he lifts up the seat when he pisses, which means he’s totally matured. Because these two are back together and are promised to be married again.
Ben Foster and Robin Wright (or as Sean Penn calls her, “WHO?”) let it be known that they were rubbing their sex parts together earlier this month when he went to the Golden Globes with her. A source tells UsWeekly that they’re back together, they’re planning to get married and they’re working on their issues, because she thinks he’s a keeper and I’m taking that to mean that the dick is so good it’s worth flying 5 hours for.
“They are fully back together and really happy. Ben is the nicest guy. She knows she has a keeper. There were a bunch of issues before, a lot because of distance and her schedule, but they are working on them. It is worth it to be with a guy like this who really cares about her so much.”
My shoulder joint is held together with duct tape and Old Brown Glue from reaching so much, but let me reach some more. Robin Wright is sort of like an older Charlize Theron to me. She’s a hot skinny blond who is made of ice, is a little scary and will slit your throat with her razor sharp bitch glare if say hi to her at SoulCycle. And Ben Foster is sort of like a younger Sean Penn. He looks like he has the sense of humor of an overworked IRS auditor and gives me “strict stepfather who is always in the garage working on mysterious ‘projects’” vibes. Robin and Sean definitely have a type. I don’t know if Robin and Ben look like they’re doing Charlize and Sean cosplay or if Charlize and Sean look like they’re doing Robin and Ben cosplay.
Here’s Robin and Ben at the Armani Prive show in Paris on Tuesday. Giorgio Armani looks delicious. He’s all silver and golden brown. He looks like a baked potato loosely wrapped in foil.