Everybody in Hollywood has probably closed their email accounts, burned their phones and laptops and have vowed to do all of their shit talking in the bathroom with the shower on or in a screening of an Adam Sandler movie since those are usually empty. Because the Sony Hack of 2014 (“Hey, that’s my official title!” – Adam Sandler) keeps producing more e-mail foolery. Last night, Buzzfeed posted an e-mail thread between Hollywood super villain Scott Rudin and the co-head of Sony Amy Pascal, and this time they’re not gnawing at each other’s throats over that Jobs movie nobody wants or committing the sin of sins by trashing St. Angie Jolie.
This time they’re joking about how President Obama must only like movies starring black people and how he must love that “greedy whore” Kevin Hart, because you know, he’s black. Dumb pieces of disgusting trash! That’s like saying that I only like gay movies, because I’m gay. (Cut to me saying, “bad example,” while throwing a cardigan over my DVD collection which includes Paris Is Burning, Priscilla, Bound, Hedwig, My Beautiful Launderette, The Wedding Banquet, Bad Education, Showgirls and He-Man & She-Ra: A Christmas Special.)
In an email from last November, Amy tells Scott that she has to go to some “stupid” breakfast hosted by the head of Dreamworks Animation Jeffrey Katzenberg. Katzenberg is a major donor to the Democratic party, so President Obama was at the breakfast. Amy asks Scott what she should ask Obama and a flood gate of messiness opened:
Amy: What should I ask the president at this stupid Jeffrey breakfast?
Scott: Would he like to finance some movies.
Amy: I doubt it. Should I ask him if he liked DJANGO?
Scott: 12 YEARS.
Amy: Or the butler. Or think like a man?
Scott: Ride-along. I bet he likes Kevin Hart.
Buzzfeed points out that Amy donated $5,000 to Obama’s re-election campaign and $30,800 to the Democratic National Committee.
Today, Scott Rudin turned on his damage control machine, typed in “apology for making racial jokes about the president,” and released the statement that was spit out. Scott Rudin farted up this “I’m sorry if you were offended” apology to Deadline:
Private emails between friends and colleagues written in haste and without much thought or sensitivity, even when the content of them is meant to be in jest, can result in offense where none was intended,” he told Deadline. “I made a series of remarks that were meant only to be funny, but in the cold light of day, they are in fact thoughtless and insensitive — and not funny at all. To anybody I’ve offended, I’m profoundly and deeply sorry, and I regret and apologize for any injury they might have caused.
Oh to be a hacker fly on the walls of Sony’s servers when the e-mail chain between Scott Rudin and Chris Rock comes through. Chris Rock recently wrote an op-ed piece about racism in Hollywood and Scott Rudin is a producer on Chris Rock’s movie Top Five. Meanwhile, President Obama picked up the phone, dialed the IRS and said, “Audit those a-holes back to the beginning of time!!!!!!!!!! Or you know, however far back you can audit their asses.”
UPDATE: Amy Pascal also apologized to the ones she offended.
The content of my emails were insensitive and inappropriate but are not an accurate reflection of who I am. Although this was a private communication that was stolen, I accept full responsibility for what I wrote and apologize to everyone who was offended.