Hot Slut Of The Day!

Pizza Hut’s Doritos-covered stuffed crust pizza! If you looked at one of Mama June’s ovary eggs through a microscope, that’s what you would see.

America really needs to step it up in the fast food fuckery game, because other countries (see: Pizza Hut China’s hot dog and shrimp tempura pizza) are showing us up and HOW. I guess Allison from The Breakfast Club is working in Australia as a head chef for Pizza Hut, because this seems like something she’d come up with. The Los Angeles Times says that at Pizza Huts in Australia, they’re offering a pizza with a mozzarella cheese-stuffed crust that’s covered with Doritos. The head of Pizza Hut Australia’s marketing department said that they burped up a pizza with a Doritos crust, because everyone loves Doritos and Doritos are the crunchiest of crunchy.

“Why Doritos? Well it is a globally loved brand and they have the best corn chips to deliver the ultimate crunch. We know from research how big an impact the crunch sound has on one’s appetite.”

In other words, they were Jaden Smith levels of STONED when they came up with this shit. Yes, that sentence was served on a bed of crushed Doritos and cheese-covered sarcasm, because every stoner’s dream job is to work in the “innovation” department at Pizza Hut. Pizza Hut said that they’re selling this stoner’s wet dream for a limited time and only in Australia for now. So those of us hos who do not live in Australia will have to make our own. Or you can just do what I’m going to do: shove Doritos, pizza, butter and mozzarella cheese in a Vitamix, blend it down and then pour it all into your mouth hole.

And it is the era of Doritos. First, Taco Bells farts up Doritos Locos Tacos and now this. I hope this leads to Popeye’s making Doritos-breaded fried chicken. My stoner mouths says YES to that even though my arteries are crying NOOOO.