Hot Slut Of The Day!

December 7, 2014 / Posted by:

Keebler Magic Middles! 

In the late 80s, the Keebler elves (aka the shifty elves who secretly worked for the Diabetes medicine industry) gave humanity what we really wanted: a chocolate chip cookie with a fudge injection. So many scat queen jokes, so little time. Magic Middles were really popular, because who doesn’t like to bite into a delicious cookie filled with cookie poop? I didn’t even know that we were living in a world without Magic Middles until the other day when I was browsing the cookie section at Target (Note: You can usually find me in the cookie section at Target).

Magic Middles came on my mind and I looked for them at Target, but couldn’t find them. A quick Google search told me that Keebler sent them to the cookie graveyard a long time ago. Some people say that Magic Middles are back and they’ve seen them at the grocery store and others say that the closest thing to Magic Middles that Keebler has out right now are Cheesecake Middles. Cheesecake Middles do nothing for me, but it’s the perfect cookie for a Golden Girl on the go.

When I’m in the cookie section at Target again today, I’ll look for Magic Middles. If I can’t find them, I’ll just get a bottle of Hershey’s syrup, a box of shortbread cookies and a turkey baster. I’ll make it happen.

And here’s the commercial:

“So he’s not the frontman for a fudge smuggling operation?” That elf was the Bruno Knight of cookie-baking elves.

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