Hot Slut Of The Day!
Lucy, the puppy that Valerie Cherish adopts and then abandons in the arms of Sarah Silverman’s sister during the first season of the greatest show on television (after Central Park West, Beverly Hills Teens, The Golden Girls and WB Superstar USA) The Comeback!
Almost ten years after HBO did us all wrong by canceling the ahead-of-its-time uncomfortable hilarious cringe fest that is The Comeback, it is finally coming back tonight for a special 8 episode encore season that’ll hopefully lead to another encore and another and another and another until Valerie Cherish is 90 years old and has to check into the old people ward of the hospital in my other favorite sad funny show Getting On (which also comes back tonight). In honor The Comeback’s long ass awaited return to our TV screens, today’s HSOTD is Lucy, the puppy that Valerie adopts in the fourth episode of the first season.
During that episode, Hollywood douche dingle and the producer of Valerie Cherish’s sitcom Room and Bored, Paulie G, makes her character say the line, “You see puppies, I see Korean barbecue!” Valerie doesn’t want to say that shit, because she’s afraid that if her character spits out that line, the audience will see her as a racist deranged puppy killer, which means they won’t like her anymore, which means she won’t get as much screen time, which means her character could be killed off (by a pack of angry puppies, of course) and her big comeback would become a huge flop. So Valerie goes to talk to the “girl writer” of the writing team to come up with a joke to replace the Korean puppy barbecue joke.
The girl writer happens to be outside of the studio playing with the puppies who have been brought in for the episode. While talking to the girl writer, Valerie picks up one of the puppies and goes on about how she and her husband have been thinking about adopting one. The puppy wrangler tells Valerie she can take that one since they’re up for adoption, so she does and mostly because she wants people to think she loves loves loves PUPPIES!!! Valerie names the puppy Lucy after her comedy idol Lucille Ball. Throughout the episode, Valerie drags Lucy with her wherever she goes and eventually, she gets over being a puppy mom and makes her reality show producer Jane (played by Laura Silverman) take the dog. And that’s the end of Lucy.
Poor Lucy, not even Valerie Cherish wants her ass.
I doubt Lucy will pop up in the second season, but I’m guessing that a few months after Jane took the poor bitch in, a huge movie producer spotted her outside of the Starbucks in West Hollywood. The movie producer cast Lucy in a movie about a dog detective and when it made $3 billion worldwide, she became the biggest bitch in Hollywood. No, she never took Valerie’s calls.