I know, somebody should really come up with a different couple name for these two hos, because every time I see “Martin Lawrence,” I get really confused when my eyes land on a picture of a white girl with Taylor Swift hair. I think to myself, “Did Sheneneh bleach her skin?” So yeah, they need a new couple name so the confusion can stop! Maybe JenRis? Or JMart? Or LaMart? Or La Wart? La Wart it definitely is!
Jennifer Lawrence and Chris Martin have reportedly been doing it for a few weeks now and even though they’ve been together in public places, there’s zero pictures of them together. No grainy cell phone pictures. No slick pictures that a tricky trick took of themselves in the foreground and La Wart in the background. None of that. But at last night’s iHeart Radio music festival at the MGM Grand in Las Vegas, Jennifer Lawrence and Chris Martin ended up in the same frame. We’re getting closer to the truth!
People says that JLaw was at Coldplay’s rehearsal and sang along. During their set at the iFart Radio music festival, she stood on the side and went to his dressing room afterward. Because you won’t believe it until you hear it from an anonymous source, here’s an anonymous source repeating what I just wrote in the sentence before this one:
“She was off to the side of the stage when he performed. After his set, she snuck back into his dressing room.”
JLaw’s PR team should leak a picture of them sucking on each other’s mouths already. Because all we’ve got are stories of her going to Coldplay shows and singing along to every song, and a picture of her backstage with Chris Martin in the background. At this point, Jennifer Lawrence is coming off as Coldplay’s #1 fan and a Chris Martin groupie stalker. I won’t judge JLaw for knowing the words to every Coldplay song (yes, I will), but I will never be able to look at her if it came out that she’s a Chris Martin groupie stalker. That’s like saying that unsalted mashed cauliflower made with tap water is your favorite food ever. Even Taylor Swift would say, “Girl, love yourself more.”