Robin Thicke Admits He Was A Drunk Pilled-Up Mess For Most Of 2013

Drug-resistant yeast infection Robin Thicke is currently in the middle of some legal shit with Marvin Gaye’s family because they claim he and dick-hatted singing rat Pharrell ripped off Marvin’s song “Got To Give It Up” for 2013’s douche anthem “Blurred Lines”. Robin and Pharrell gave their deposition way back in April, but they were kept sealed until this morning, when they were brought out in a Los Angeles court. According to The Hollywood Reporter (via Radar), it all began when lawyers for Marvin’s family brought up a quote Alan’s sleazy son gave to GQ last year where he pretty much admits that “Blurred Lines” is the cheap Chinatown knock-off of Marvin’s “Got To Give It Up”:

“Pharrell and I were in the studio and I told him that one of my favorite songs of all time was Marvin Gaye’s ‘Got to Give It Up.’ I was like, ‘Damn, we should make something like that, something with that groove.’ Then he started playing a little something and we literally wrote the song in about a half hour and recorded it.”

When lawyers remind Robin that he said this shit, Robin claims he only said what he said because he was jealous that Pharrell was going to get all the credit for the massive success of “Blurred Lines”, so he exaggerated how much involvement he actually had in the making of it. Which, according to Robin, was zero involvement, because was a Lindsay Lohan-level of coherent when they were in the studio making it.

“To be honest, that’s the only part where — I was high on Vicodin and alcohol when I showed up at the studio. So my recollection is when we made the song, I thought I wanted — I — I wanted to be more involved than I actually was by the time, nine months later, it became a huge hit and I wanted credit.”

You see, your honor! Robin couldn’t have knowingly ripped off Marvin Gaye! He was too drunk and stoned! He also said he couldn’t recall specific interviews in 2013, because he had a “drug and alcohol problem for a year” and “didn’t do a sober interview” (apparently that bitch was giving journalists both blurred and slurred lines). Speaking of, booze and pills weren’t his only friends he threw under the bus; that two-faced bitch went after Swaggy Ratatouille too!

“So I started kind of convincing myself that I was a little more part of it than I was and I — because I didn’t want him — I wanted some credit for this big hit. But the reality is, is that Pharrell had the beat and he wrote almost every single part of the song.”

So first he pulls a Shaggy and claims it wasn’t him, because the him in question was snorting lines of Vicodin out of a call girl’s bleached asshole, and then prison snitches on his former cellmate. Stay classy, you infected dick pimple! I’m surprised he didn’t also find a way to blame this shit on his former partner in flat-assed VMA fuckery, Miley Cyrus. “Um…I’m also innocent…because when I told Pharrell that one of my favorite songs was “Got To Give It Up”, I was actually reading a text that Miley Cyrus had sent me…and she should have been more clear about that shit…because I was high on pills….so….”

But did the pill problem carry over to 2014 as well? Because that might explain the existence of Paula. Vicodin will make you do some dumb shit! One time a doctor prescribed me a whole mess of Vicodin and I spent a 8 hours watching an Animal Planet special on talking monkeys (at least I thought they were talking).