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September 7, 2014 / Posted by:

Tinkerbell Cosmetics’ paint-on peel-off nail polish!

Tinkerbell Cosmetics was a line of drugstore makeup for kids in the 80s and 90s and they sold everything from lipstick to a stank perfume that burned sores into the inside of my nose and I swear I still have scars from smelling it. The  most popular thing in their pink treasure chest of beauty essentials for kids and the crown jewel in their collection was their peel off nail polish. They called it “BO PO,” which is short for “brush on, peel off,” but it reads more like an abbreviation a person with Dyslexia would write for “pissed off body odor.”

As Susie’s ginger mom is telling your ass in that ad above, Bo Po was perfect for kids, because you didn’t need to use nail polish remover to get it off. That was a serious selling point for parents, because I remember always hearing about the dangers of sniffing nail polisher remover. Adults thought that if kids got one sniff of nail polish remover, we’d get high, which would turn us into crazed nailpolishremoverheads and we’d skip school to troll drugstore aisles looking for a fix. And that would lead us to smoking crack, obviously. Nail polisher remover was a gateway drug! Little did parents know that you could get a quick high if you peeled off and snorted Tinkerbell nail polish. Speaking of elementary school crackheads…

I sat next to this girl in school who wore Bo Po a lot and her nails always looked a mess. Chunks of her nail polish would peel off by itself so she always had the nails of a crack whore. It was a look.

You can still buy Bo Po nail polish today, so children of the now can experience the magic, wonder and satisfaction of peeling off their nail polish! I am imagine that it’s almost as satisfying as peeling off your skin after a sunburn. File that last sentence under: Things That A Young Buffalo Bill Might Say.

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