Hot Slut Of The Day!

September 1, 2014 / Posted by:

The overworked single mother of two shitty kids in Donna Summer’s video for “She Works Hard For The Money.

The single mom  (who is kind of giving me Rhoda with Geri Jewell hair) in Donna Summer’s “She Works Hard For The Money” video is going through it and is totally over it. She has to get up at the hour of the crackheads to drag her ass to her first job where she has scrub the floors with a flimsy ass rag (somebody please get her a Hoover FloorMate or at least a Swiffer Wet Jet). Once she’s done making her joints sore at her first job, she has to drag her ass to her second job at a diner where she has to deal with nasty turd bags sexually harassing her while she tries to deliver some goddamn food. The single mom’s day isn’t done there. Then she has to go to her third job at the factory where she has to try to not have a nervous breakdown while sewing shit. She wishes she could just go home, collapse on her bed and dream of being a professional dancer and having Jennifer Beal’s life. But instead she has to go to the grocery store, carry heavy groceries across the train tracks and feed her ungrateful, asshole brat kids who are total devil monsters and loudly fight with each other while she’s trying to rest her bones and soul. Every day she lives the lives of Cinderella, Alice AND a Project Runway contestant and her demon children don’t give a shit. At least, her fairy disco godmother Donna Summer feels for her.

That whiny ass Fantine from Les Miserables has nothing on this working single mom. This working single mom doesn’t have time to dream a dream, because she’s too busy working hard to feed her piece of trash children.

My mom didn’t work three jobs to support us, but she did work at least 25 hours a day. We weren’t as shitty as those kids (insert sideeyefrommymom.gif here), but that’s probably because my abuelita took care of us during the day and we’d have the Havaianas logo embedded into our cheeks if we spilled the milk like that. So that mom needs an abuelita to set those kids right. Or she needs to sell them into child slavery so she can quit two of her jobs. (Actually, those monsters would get below market value, so she’d only be able to quit one job, but still.)

This Labor Day goes out to all the overworked, drained single moms of shitty kids. Just know that it’s okay to make your life easier by selling your brats into child slavery or by renting an abuelita who will scare the brattiness out of them. Happy Labor Day!

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