Tyler Perry Is Arthouse

August 27, 2014 / Posted by:

Tyler Perry stars as attorney Tanner Bolt in the film adaption of that goddamn ever-present Gone Girl book. Madea told Yahoo Movies that she had no idea who director David Fincher was, had never heard of the book, and wouldn’t have done the movie if she’d known how popular the two were. She’s so indie.

“I probably would have walked away from it. If I had known who David Fincher was, and his body of work, or if I’d known the book was so popular, I would have said, No,” he admits. “And my agent knew that! He didn’t tell me until after I signed on!”

I had no idea Tyler lived in a hermetically sealed arthouse cinema which only plays the films of Cassavetes, Bergman, Truffaut, Goddard, and Fellini (I have access to Wikipedia). When did this bitch get so bougie? HES FUCKIKNG MADEA. There are eight Madea films which don’t exactly play at the Brattle in Harvard Square. He didn’t know who David Fincher (Se7en, The Social Network, The Curious Case of Benjamin Buttons, Panic Room, need I go on?) was? This bitch inexplicably popped up in the middle of the Star Trek remake and didn’t know who David Fincher was? Those fake tits under that housedress are full of LIES.

I’ll give him Gone Girl cuz’ not everyone’s a reader and I’m guessing he doesn’t take the subway.

Check out the latest trailer for Gone Girl and a couple of pics of Madea stooping to appear in utterly commercial and soulless cinema below. Hallelujer!

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