Justin Bieber (seen above trying for “sexy” and ending up with “shart”) has been feeling very liberated after shaving his poopstache so he allegedly tried to grab a cellphone off a guy at Dave & Buster’s in Hollywood last night.
TMZ reports that Asshole and his on-again/off-again girlfriend Chipmunkra (Selena Gomez) were hanging at the chain restaurant/arcade when another patron reportedly started clicking away at them on his phone. Justin refused to be snapped losing to his piece at the giant Connect Four game so he went for the dude’s phone. His security held him back, someone called the authorities, and his ass left before they got there. I hope someone mopped his prize tickets and used them to buy some gum Serves him right. (I never win enough tickets at that bullshit so I always end up getting gum or a plastic bird you can whistle through after adding water.)
You know there’s one paid suffering bastard on that security team who dreams about letting him actually go to try and slap at someone just once. And in their fantasy, Bieber suddenly freezes in terror when he finds his excuse gone and then gets knocked the fuck out. Not everyone punches like Legolas, gurl.
According to the LA Times, Bieber didn’t have to leave. Police reported “there’s been no theft, no scuffle and no crime occurred.” He’s free to wine and dine his girl once more in that most elegant of establishments. “Hey, girl, you play as much skeeball as you can possibly stand. We ballin’ tonight.”
Check out Justin in black and pink arriving at the Guitar Centre in Hollywood last Saturday in the gallery below.