Casey Kasem’s Crazy Widow Will Bury His Body In Norway
Last week, TMZ reported that Casey Kasem’s gold digging, sane-deficient widow, Jean Kasem, was trying to move his body from a funeral home in Montreal to Oslo, Norway. Casey’s oldest children were trying to stop that from happening, because they claim that he wanted to be buried at Forest Lawn in Glendale, CA. The people of Oslo better arm themselves with buns and blocks of cheese, because that crazy bitch is coming their way and she attacks with raw hamburger meat. So if she hamburgers them in the face, they can at least cook that meat up and have a delicious meal.
The Los Angeles Times says that Jean petitioned officials in Norway to allow Casey to be buried there. Instead of listening to Jean’s pleas, the officials should’ve quickly passed a law banning all American Amazons whose born name is “Jean Thompson” and who has a crazy twinkle in their eye that says, “If you stick your peen in me, we’ll be tied together forever and ever.” But instead of banning Jean, Norwegian officials are letting her into their country and letting her bury Casey in Oslo. Jean wrote in her letter to officials that she has Norwegian roots and is planning to move to Norway by the end of this year. Jean also claimed in her letter that Casey wanted to be buried in Norway, because he “always said that Norway symbolizes peace and looks like heaven.” Jean just wants to fulfill his wishes.
Casey died on June 15 and ever since then, Jean has been dragging his body all over the place. Santa Monica PD wanted to do an autopsy on Casey’s body, because they felt that the results would help them build their case against Jean for elder abuse. But Jean pulled his body out of California before they got a chance. TMZ says that detectives aren’t really worried, because after interviewing Casey’s doctors, they feel they have enough evidence for the L.A. County D.A. to press charges against her.
A rep for Casey’s Scientologist daughter Kerri Kasem tells People that they don’t even think that Casey has ever been to Norway and Jean is obviously trying to hide his body from the cops:
“The bottom line is, Jean is hiding from authorities. She’s hiding the body away from the authorities, family and friends. She has been doing things like this her whole life, according to the children. Who takes a body to a place where he has allegedly never been? It makes no sense at all. They are obviously not happy about it, but what can they do?”
Oh please, I doubt Jean is going to bury Casey in Norway. The bitch is crazy, but the bitch isn’t completely stupid. If she buries Casey, there’s still a chance that investigators can exhume his body to examine it for pepaw abuse. I would say that Jean is probably going to have Casey ‘s body cremated to destroy any pepaw abuse evidence, but that’s way too reasonable for her. Hmm…I wonder what Jean’s going to do. I wonder. Oh, speak of the she-devil. This headline just popped up on my RSS feed: “Hamburger Aficionado Jean Kasem Plans To Open Up A Raw Meat Shop In Oslo.” Yeah okay, now let’s go back to wondering what Jean is going to do with Casey’s body. Hmmm…