When it was announced yesterday that Lifetime was set to air a biopic about the life and tragic death of Brittany Murphy, most of us rolled our eyes, shook our heads in disbelief, and added another name to the already too-long list of tasteless low-budget Lifetime biopics. But then after about 15 minutes, we got over it, because as if the ghost of the voice of Luanne Platter really gives a shit that some second-rate cable channel threw together a shoddy made-for-TV movie about her life.
But not Brittany’s sleazy payday-sniffin’ papa Angelo Bertolotti! Angelo pretty much split shortly after she was born, and only resurfaced once she got famous (ah, classic Hollywood cockroach parenting). Then he kind of split again after she wouldn’t let him hump on her bank account, and was estranged from her for the last 8 years of her life. But that hasn’t stopped him from using the name @BrittMurphyDad on Twitter or re-launching investigations into her death and running to the press. But Angelo is so shook-up at the idea that anyone would exploit Brittany’s death for profits! Well, you know, besides him. According to Radar, the second Angelo heard that Lifetime had made an biopic about his daughter, he immediately called up his lawyer (who I’m guessing is probably Saul Goodman) because he wants to make sure he sees a cut of the profits. NO! He’s totally not trying to hustle Lifetime for dollars! Angelo claims he’s threatening to sue the pants off them because he claims that Lifetime has not been authorized to produce the “true story” of Brittany Murphy, and because he was never consulted during production.
All this would seem like Angelo has only the best of intentions for preserving his daughter’s memory, until you realize his only memories of Brittany Murphy involve stuffing his pockets with cash, so basically he lawyered-up to #getmoneybitch. Except he’s clearly not familiar with Lifetime, otherwise he’d realize there’s no damn money to get! The production budget for House of Versace was about $2,000 (maybe $2,500, tops), and don’t get me started on that $3 disaster called The Anna Nicole Smith Story. Angelo can try to sue Lifetime, but the most he’s going to make off with is about $100 and a jacked Liz Taylor wig (and that’s if the wigs haven’t been sold on Craigslist yet).