Hot Slut Of The Day!

August 10, 2014 / Posted by:

We’ve all been Mozart Dog. (Shit, if Mozart Dog was petting the party thrower’s cat while holding a plastic cup full of vodka, he’d be me at every party.) We’ve all sat by ourselves at a party while the happy ass partiers sing Happy Birthday around delicious cake. As we wallow in our loneliness and taste the sadness of not having delicious cake on our tongue, Mozart swells in our ears, because Mozart knew what it was like to be Forever Alone at a party and miss out on sweet, delicious cake.

Mozart Dog is all of us!

You can tell that Mozart Dog’s sadness is quickly turning into a thirst for revenge. This is how villains are made. Mozart Dog is Carrie if Carrie was an adorable chunky ball of fur with bad hips and cataracts. Mozart Dog will get all of those bitches by burning that place down! Or he’ll just wait until they all drunkenly pass out so he can diarrhea in their shoes and lick the cake frosting off of their teefs.

via College Humor (For Ramon)

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