Kanye West Says That The Celebrities Who Fight Back Against The Paparazzi Are The New Civil Rights Activists
Good news for those of you who like to start your morning off with a heaping helping of piping-hot delusion spit from the mouth of an obnoxious narcissist: TMZ has obtained a copy of Kanye West’s deposition in the case where he’s accused of whooping a pap and smashing his camera, and it’s truly Kanye at his most Kanye-iest. Which is to say, he comes across as an egotistical pampered asshole who chugs 2L bottles of liquid arrogance to stays hydrated.
Kim Kardashian’s kurrent husband begins his deposition by announcing: “I’m the smartest celebrity you’ve ever fucking dealt with. I’m not Britney Spears.” STOP. RIGHT. THERE. How dare he throw sedated Southern angel Brit Brit under the bus like that?!? RUDE. Next, when he’s asked where he lives, he answers “Earth.” Kanye then follows up his high-larious Earth joke by taking a cunty swipe at the pap’s lawyer, Nate Goldberg, and telling him how lucky he is to be in the presence of Kanye West:
“I’m in the business of trying to make dope shit for the world. You’re in the business of representing scums and trying to make as much money as long as there’s this lapse in the law.”
Nate Goldberg then asks Kanye about his song “Flashing Lights” and quotes the line: “Till I get flashed by the paparazzi, damn, these niggas got me”, to which Kanye interrupts Nate and hisses:
“You have to ask for a hall pass. You can’t just say the ‘n’ word around me. It offends me because you’re a white person saying ‘nigga.’”
I don’t know who Nate Goldberg is – he could be the kind of asshole who cuts in line at BevMo and listens to Nickelback – but I feel so fucking sorry for him. Kanye, however, doesn’t, and kept heaping piles of migraine-inducing shit on him by comparing the black civil rights movement to celebrities who don’t want their picture taken:
“I mean in the ’60s people used to hold up ‘Die Nigger’ signs when my parents were in the sit-ins also.”
And when Goldberg, who at this point in time has probably cracked open a bottle of extra strength Motrin, asks Kanye if he’s seriously comparing to Rosa Parks on the bus to Kanye West grabbing a pap’s camera, he says:
“Yes, 100 … I equate it to discrimination. I equate it to inequalities. We, as group of minorities here in L.A., as celebrities have to ban together to influence guys like this — guys trying to take the picture, guys trying to get the big win, guys trying to get the check.”
There you have it! From Kanye’s shit-spitting lips to God’s ears, Kanye West is the new Martin Luther King Jr. (“Well, that’s a bummer” – MLK). January 15th is now Kanye West Day, and everyone will get the day off to observe the tireless efforts of Celebrity Civil Rights Leader Kanye West and his fight against people who wait outside the Givenchy store to take his picture.
And here’s Kanye’s Coretta Scott King shopping in Beverly Hills yesterday and greeting the paps she totally doesn’t have on speed dial and totally didn’t call to meet her there.