Night Crumbs

Vanity Fair denies using the toupee Photoshop tool to add more fur to Prince William’s bald head, but Baby Prince George’s, “Hahaha, they’re totally going to Photoshop more hair onto your naked-ass dome” look says it all – Lainey Gossip 

Kate Upton’s tits look like two 22lb hams falling out of a ripped grocery bag – Drunken Stepfather

BREAKING NEWS: Ryan Gosling goes grocery shopping and makes food for Eva Mendes – Celebitchy

Phaedra Parks’ prison piece trophy husband has to pay back the $1.9 million he stole from the banks. Either the feds are going to have to start pulling dollars out of the g-strings of the strippers Apollo visits or he’ll have to pucker up and get into gay porn – Reality Tea

Lindsay Lohan is a few more 8-balls and a couple of kegs away from growing a glorious GUNT – The Superficial

Ricky Martin helped Ian Thorpe with his big coming out and I’m taking that to mean that Ricky Martin helped Ian Thorpe come out of his chonies before mentoring him with his peen – Towleroad

I see that Christ Bearer’s LSD buzz still hasn’t worn off – WWTDD

If you live in Italy and are missing a priceless seahorse statue, I found it – Hollywood Tuna

Adele’s new album “25” will start making hos cry and feel emotion next year – Jezebel

I think I’d rather see Lea Michele’s hooker piece in those bikini bottoms instead – Popsugar

Why is Natalie Porman wearing my favorite 7-year-old summer break outfit? – Popoholic

In case you’re wondering why there’s a WANTED sign with Our Lady of Cheetos’ face on it at The Cheesecake Factory – ICYDK

This girl who’s high on novocaine and going on about white dick and Ryan Gosling sounds pretty much like me when I’m one hundred percent sober – The Berry

It truly is the renaissance of Weird Al! – Pajiba

Michael Vartan and that chick he stalked and married broke up – Just Jared

Joe ManJello teaches Conan O’Brien some stripper moves and wears way too many clothes while doing so – SOW