Just typing the words “fashion rant” took me back to the time in 7th grade when this hay-haired skank named Cory told me I was wearing the wrong kind of white knee socks and ranted at me for like 5 minutes about how you’re supposed to wear the kind that pull over your knees like Cher in Clueless and not under your knee like Jan Brady. I should have hissed back “Bitch, don’t come for me when you’re wearing a Chip and Pepper t-shirt well past 1991″ but I didn’t. I know, it’s one of my only regrets in this life.
Thankfully, the crowd at London’s Wireless Festival was braver than I and told Kanye West exactly how they felt when he took a break in the middle of his performance of “Runaway” to give a TED Talk on fashion. According to The Daily Mail, Kim’s kurrent husband began his rant by reminding the audience that he still has a massive God Complex:
“They taking the idea of celebrity and make me seem like I was stupid or something! I just want to be awesome and hang around my awesome friends and change the world!”
Followed by pulling out his Burn Book and taking a swipe at the mean girls who won’t let him sit at their lunch table anymore.
“I’m not going to mention any names but… Nike, Louis Vuitton and Gucci. Don’t discriminate against me ’cause I’m a black man making music.”
He also went on and on about creating and being a genius and bla bla bla, basically regular Kanye shit. Since the last thing people want while they’re rolling hard on molly and jungle juice is a lecture, the crowd started booing, and when booing got boring, several hundred decided to leave before his set was even finished.
I’m happy Kanye is into something, but he has NO RIGHT preaching about the fashion industry while wearing a jank-ass Hobby Lobby-looking beaded mask and baby blue tie-dye pajamas. He looks like a gay Cobra Commander. North West, come get your father! Yes, you have a father. You also have a mother. I know, it’s shocking, just trust me on this one.