Professional iTunes jockey Calvin Harris confirmed yesterday on Twitter that he was official done humping on British singer Rita “The Whore-a” Ora by saying “She is a beautiful, talented woman & I wish her all the best”, but if he wasn’t limited by the 140 characters of Twitter, he probably would have added “…in her quest to fuck and suck every famous penis from here to Alaska.” Or Egypt, as the case may be.
But according to TMZ, the love between Calvin Harris and Rita Ora didn’t die because he kept finding sand and camel hairs in her pussy; it died because Calvin discovered Rita had been cozying up to the little brittle turd of Canada, Justin Bieber.
Our sources say Justin and Rita got “touchy feely” with each other while they were in the recording studio together over the last few months. Calivn heard they were very affectionate – she would sit on his lap, he would rub her back, etc.
Justin was down in Mexico for the last few days, and not coincidentally Rita was there as well.
Sources close to Harris and Rita tell TMZ he’s already had her things removed from his L.A. house. We’re also told he produced a few songs for her, but now he won’t allow their release.
When Rita Ora cheated on The Sock One with that arrogant asshole Jonah Hill, she proved there isn’t a dick too nasty or shameful that she wouldn’t proudly pop her pussy on, so it doesn’t surprise me that she’d try to get with Justin Bieber; I think her pussy is drawn to the scent of douche and money.
And I hope that between fucking My Buddy’s spoiled pre-teen cousin and reading him a bedtime story, she whipped out her eyebrow kit and gave him a quick tutorial on how to pencil in his pathetic dirt stache.