Yesterday, the used enema that was brought to life with the spirit of King Joffrey apologized for his latest racist video by Instagramming scripture from the Bible. I don’t know exactly how many pages there are in the Bible, but the Biebs better hope there’s a whole lot, because he’s going to need to Instagram more Bible pages since Page Six says that there’s more racist videos out there. Some source says that there’s about 15 to 20 more minutes of the Biebs spewing out racist jokes. So prepare your eyes for non-stop rolling and prepare your mouth for non-stop yawning, because a whole TIME Life series of Justin Bieber spitting out racist fuckery could be coming.
After The Sun posted the first video of a 15-year-old Justin Bieber burping out that racist joke, TMZ, the epitome of restraint, also posted the video and said that they’ve been sitting on it for four years. TMZ said that they didn’t release it when they first got their hands on it, because the Biebs was only 15 at the time and they heard he was really, really sowwy about it. We all threw a “Bitch, we know you” side-eye at TMZ for that one. Well, Defamer has learned from a source that TMZ wasn’t sitting on those videos because they felt bad for the Biebs. They were using those videos to get exclusive interviews and tips from his team. Defamer’s source put it like this:
“TMZ has been sitting on this video for 3+ years and have been using it as essentially ransom so that Bieber and his team would cooperate with them and give them scoops. It was very close to being released initially, but his team was able to convince them not to by giving them access and compliance.”
TMZ calls Defamer’s story a pile of lies and they deny ever hanging those videos over Justin’s turd head for four years.
I figured blackmailing tricks was a standard thing in Hollywood. I mean, Pimp Mama Kris has probably been holding Ryan Seacrest’s immediately family hostage in the dungeon of her house for years. But still. The guy whose house was egged by the Biebs should blame TMZ for that. The janitor who had to empty the bucket of the Biebs’ douche piss should blame TMZ for that. Hilary Swank and lesbian beavers should blame TMZ for why they’ve suffered through years of being compared to him. And humanity should blame TMZ for the ear skin they’ve lost while stabbing their hearing holes whenever his songs come on. Because if TMZ posted those videos 4 years ago, they could’ve stopped the toddler monster before he unleashed the douche demon inside and terrorized the world. Damn you, Harvey Levin!