Hot Slut Of The Day!

June 3, 2014 / Posted by:

The expandable popcorn shirt from the 90s! 

I’m assuming that during last night’s CFDA Awards in NYC, they awarded the Lifetime Achievement in Excellence Award to the reincarnation of Christian Dior for designing the top that started out as Tom Cruise size and then expanded into regular size on your body. It was one size fits all. It was magic! Or something. The expandable popcorn top was supposed to change everyone’s lives for the better in the 90s and packing was never going to be the same again. It didn’t change anybody’s live and packing is still an act of torture. First of all, it didn’t get that much smaller. Second of all, it was uglier than a hair-encrusted dried booger.

I guess it was supposed to look like dyed bubble wrap, but it looked more like an extremely painful amphibian skin disease. It looked like you rubbed up against Donald Sterling. But yet, a lot of people wore them out in public, because they wanted to strut around all smugly like, “Look at me, I’m wearing the future!” And yes, I type that as a ho who in the 90s strutted around in a Hypercolor tank top like, “Look at me, I’m wearing the future!

Pic: PopcornShirt.com

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