Night Crumbs

May 14, 2014 / Posted by:

Amal Alamuddin is new to the game and she’s already got the “OHMYGOD LEAVE ME ALONE BUT MAKE SURE TO GET A CLOSE-UP HI-RES SHOT OF THE HUGE DIAMOND ENGAGEMENT RING THAT SO-CALLED PERPETUAL BACHELOR GEORGE CLOONEY GAVE ME” move down - Lainey Gossip 

“I sure as Hell ain’t taking credit for that shit!”God to Jennifer AnistonCelebitchy

And five seconds after these pictures were taken, those flowers shriveled up and died from being exposed to that trash heap heffa – Reality Tea

The Porn Iguana schools the attention whores-in-training on how to take the perfect selfie – Drunken Stepfather

Goopy Paltrow didn’t care that Chris Martin was consciously copulating with Alexa Chung months ago, so why would she care now? – The Superficial

The Mighty O gave Michael Sam a “docu-series”Towleroad

How many Lisa Frank snakes had to be skinned to make the ugly outfit that Ceiling Eyes is wearing? – Hollywood Tuna

I’d think Prince Hot Ginge is more Kate Moss’ type since he wouldn’t flinch an eye if she asked him to snort a line off her choche lips – Popsugar

Selena Gomez doesn’t trust the airline enough to check the double-sided dildos that she and Justin Bieber use together – Popoholic

Carmena Carrera gives us Adam AND Eve – Jezebel

Khloezilla got Lamar Odom banned from a club for a night – ICYDK

James Franco thinks Spring Breakers is Taxi Driver levels of great – Just Jared

Ashley Benson in ComplexIDLYITW

IMPECCABLE EYEBROW SITUATIONS ALERT! – The Berry

Florida, there’s your congressman, picking and eating his ear funk – Tosh.0

CBS didn’t pick up How I Met Your Dad, because they wanted to pick-up another show that speaks more to their demographic. It’s called How I Met Your GrandpaPajiba

It took awhile, but the bats finally got Ozzy Osbourne back – SOW

It wouldn’t officially be Hump Day without seeing some nalgas, so today’s are brought to you by Charlie Barnett  – OMG Blog

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