Hot Slut Of The Day!

May 13, 2014 / Posted by:

The Tom Daley of turtles who stole the show with its RIVETING and THRILLING dive skills at the 2014 PGA Championship! 

We all already know that golf is the most action-packed sport and most of us have to snort several lines of crushed Aspirin and Xanax before we watch it or our hearts will rip right out of our chests from freaking out while wondering if the ball is going to go into the hole or not (Side note: Scientologists who have been in the viewing galley during John Travolta and Kelly Preston’s mating ceremony feel the same way). But believe it or not, golf became even more OMGMYASSLIPSAREEXPLODING riveting a few days ago when a turtle prepared to dive head first off of a dock at the 16th hole. The crowd and the commentators stopped everything to bite their finger nails and toe nails off while watching the turtle prepare to dive. Not since Larry King was on air, have hos been so riveted by a turtle.

The commentators were not impressed with that turtle’s diving form, but that turtle don’t care. That turtle wasn’t trying to bust out a perfect dive. It was trying to commit suicide to escape that boring ass golf shit.

via HuffPo

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