Night Crumbs

May 1, 2014 / Posted by:

Most hos in California don’t seem that fazed by the water shortage, but I’m sure they’ll all be screaming in the streets when it’s announced that there’s a silicone shortage because most of the state’s supply has gone into the Porn Iguana’s possibly new tits – Hollywood Tuna

WWKBS? (What Would Kristen Bell Say?) Goopy Paltrow let the paps take pictures of her Gooplings as long as they name checked her GOOP jeans – Lainey Gossip

Sorry, Michael Lohan, but your reign as Father of the year has come to an end, because this year the title goes to Courtney Love’s dad for basically calling her a murderer in a book – Celebitchy

Kathy Griffin went full messy gay when she found herself in the presence of MadgeTowleroad

When Uncle Terry shoots Rita Whore, she ends up looking like a slutty Jafar in sad drag – Drunken Stepfather

Cindy Lou Who’s new video looks like a cross between a flop Grateful Dead festival and rejected scenes from a Kanye video – The Superficial

If Sheree comes back to The Real Housewives of Atlanta, we’ll finally get to see the glorious Chateau Sheree. I can’t want to see the grand ballroom made of popsicle sticks and leaves – Reality Tea

Meet the Brazilian gravedigger that I’d gladly let dig my hole – Buzzfeed

Thanks to an oh-so-subtle “ring hand on the purse” pose, Jessica Biel lets us know that she’s still married – Popoholic

V. Stiviano thinks she’s the Rosa Parks of racist billionaire side tricks – Jezebel

BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUULGE – The Berry

Dear Naomi Watts, please give that dress back to the Bea Arthur Estate where it belongs – Just Jared

Jason Priestly spreads slanderous lies! We all know that Brenda Walsh was an innocent, well-behaved angel in the 90s – ICYDK

Scientific question! How many different species of roaches do you think are living in Steven Tyler’s beard? – SOW

Your healthy dose of peen for the day, brought to you by Seth Gillam – (NSFW) OMG Blog

Jennifer Lawrence is FHM’s Sexiest Woman In The World – IDLYITW

Ellen and Ellen have a heart to heart about coming out as a gayelle – Popsugar

Jordan Knight and Nick Carter started a two-piece group called Nick & Knight, because money – HuffPo

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