Remember when you were in the 8th grade and you were sitting with your friend Cecelia when your other Ruby walked by and you went, “Hey, Ruby.” Then Cecelia rolled her eyes, smacked her lips and said, “I hate that bitch,” and you went, “Cecelia, Ruby is my friend, okay,” and Cecelia went, “Well, your little freeeend is a two-faced ugly bitch,” and you went, “Ugh, whatever, SAY-SEAL-YAH” before storming off all dramatic-like. Then two weeks later when Cecelia asked you to sign her yearbook, you wrote, “Have a hot fucking summer xoxoxo RUBY’S FRIEND.” Well, that situation pretty much repeated itself at a restaurant in the Wynn Las Vegas two weeks ago except the part of Cecelia was played by casino mogul Steve Wynn, the part of you was played by George Clooney and the part of Ruby was played by President Obama.
Norm Clarke of The Las Vegas Review-Journal says that a 52-year-old white millionaire got into a bitch fight with a 72-year-old white billionaire when Obama’s name came up. Two rich whores having a drunken, messy fight over politics isn’t exactly news, but these two melodramatic pissy messes made it news by burping up hilariously bitchy statements about that night to Norm Clarke. George says that Steve Wynn is a ranting mess who insulted his best friend President Obama. Steve Wynn says that George Clooney is an angry, delusional drunk. YES! I love it when two old rich bitches bring the drama and start scratching at each other. Pass the popped caviar and a Big Gulp full of Krug Brut.
George and Steve were having dinner and drinking tequila with a bunch of other people when George got heavily offended over Steve calling his best friend forever Obama “an asshole.” In an email through his publicist, George spit out this bitchy bitch slap:
“He called the president an asshole … that is a fact … I said the President was my longtime friend and then he said ‘your friend is an asshole.’ … At that point I told Steve that HE was an asshole and I wasn’t going to sit at his table while he was being such a jackass. And I walked out. There were obviously quite a few more adjectives and adverbs used by both of us. Those are all the facts. It had nothing to do with politics and everything to do with character.”
Steve’s version is a little different. Steve says that some CAA agent at the table made a joke about Mikhail Gorbachev and since George Clooney can’t handle his tequila and booze turns him into a delicate b-hole, he threw a tantrum and dramatically left the restaurant. The billionaire who kind of looks like a Wayne Newton statue made out of crispy bacon fat then channeled Jennifer North from Valley of the Dolls, but instead of saying, “You know how bitchy fags can be,” he basically said, “You know how bitchy actors can be.”
“He stood up and threw a hissy fit. Then he sat down and started talking about the Affordable Care Act, and that’s when I spoke up. He didn’t like that either. I think my discussion about the Affordable Care Act was the straw that broke the camel’s back. When he’s drinking, he considers himself a close personal buddy of the president. He got up and said, ‘I don’t have to listen to this (expletive) stuff.’ The only person who got excited at the table was George, and he ran off to another bar. Clooney’s fun to be with when he’s sober. If you have a chance to drink with him, you want to get there early, and don’t stay late. Everybody who’s in my business, the casino business, knows to take actors with a grain of salt.”
Norm Clarke couldn’t ask the other people at the table what really happened because most of them died from second-hand embarrassment while watching two rich assholes try to out-asshole each other as their egos exploded. I’m Team NO ONE, but I did throw out a slow clap for Steve Wynn, because that Las Vegas-faced mess can throw shade. “...Take actors with a grain of salt.” Those are fighting words that will start a dance-off!