Sucio creepy pervs unite! Nothing makes my b-hole close up like a picture of Uncle Terry and R. Kelly throwing their fists up and my b-hole never closes up!
Page Six says that another sexual harassment lawsuit has been added to the mountain of sexual abuse lawsuits that Lady CaCa’s partner in foolery has been hit with and settled in the past. Page Six recently learned that in 2010, R. Kelly’s 36-year-old housekeeper of a year hit him with a lawsuit after he allegedly filled her ear holes with dirty talk and groped her. R. Kelly didn’t want to take it to court, so they settled for $100,000. A source tells Page Six that lately shit hasn’t been all rainbows and strawberry-scented piss in R. Kelly’s camp. They’re all scared that more secrets from the underage girls he had sex with and paid off are about to come out. Last year, The Village Voice ran an interview with Chicago-Sun Times pop music critic Jim DeRogatis who has spent 15 years reporting about how R. Kelly has had sex with and manipulated dozens of underage girls in Chicago. R. Kelly has never been convicted of child touching. Many of the cases settled without going to trial.
Well, I guess R. Kelly’s an equal-opportunity creepy piece of trash, because this time he did wrong things to someone who’s actually over the age of 18. And if you’re like me, then every time you see an R. Kelly headline your first thought is, “But did he piss on her?” I hate that about my brain.
And I won’t be surprised if Hollywood greenlights a PedoBear biopic co-directed by Bryan Singer and Woody Allen with art direction by Uncle Terry and music by R. Kelly.
Pic: Terry Richardson