Hot Slut Of The Day!

April 20, 2014 / Posted by:

Hershey’s extremely tasteful and holy gourmet delicacy: The Chocolate Crucifix! 

Thousands of years ago, Jesus died on the cross for our sins and according to Hershey, those sins taste like milk chocolate. Works for me! The fully stocked bong next to me and the bowl full of jelly beans, Reese’s peanut butters eggs, Cadbury Creme Egg whites (I’m watching my cholesterol) and Peeps that I plan to stick my head into and not come up until it’s empty or I fall into a diabetes coma tells me that it’s Easter times again! It isn’t officially a religious holiday until corporations are whoring the fuck out of it. Hershey’s contribution is this chocolate cross, which I’m sure has hints of Jesus’ blood and rusty nails mixed in with the milk chocolate taste.

But I’m a little mad and offended. Hershey puts out something special and classy (Side note: It would’ve been extra classy if they put a tiny chocolate Jesus on it) for the chocolate-loving Christian set, but where is their chocolate bong to commemorate my personal religious holiday: 4/20? But then again, I guess everything Hershey puts out celebrates 4/20.

Happy Weedster, everyone!

Pic: Walmart (but you already knew that)

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