UPDATE: Christ Bearer And His Peen Are Forever Parted And Wu-Tang Denies He’s Affiliated With Them

April 17, 2014 / Posted by:

The good news is that L.A.-based rapper Christ Bearer (born name: Andre Johnson), who cut off his dick before jumping off of a second story balcony, has been downgraded from critical condition to stable condition. The bad news is that doctors weren’t able to sew his peen back on John Wayne Bobbitt-style and his peen has been laid to rest in a peen coffin.

TMZ (of course) somehow found out that doctors at Cedars-Sinai were unable to re-attach Andre Johnson’s peen. Meanwhile, Wu-Tang Clan had to kick a dude while he’s down, out and mourning his peen. Yesterday, they threw up a note on Instagram¬†and their blog (via The Village Voice) denying that Christ Bearer has ever been part of the Wu-Tang brand.

Parental Advisory : Don’t Believe The HYPE. This Mother Fucker Ain’t Got Shit to do with WUTANG ..~Mr .TANG Www.WuTangclan.com

Someone has since erased that note from Wu-Tang’s Instagram and their blog. Christ Bearer is in the rap duo Northstar and they were discovered by RZA and he’s worked with the West Coast Killa Beez, so he IS affiliated with Wu-Tang. Who knows why they’ve cut him off and are pulling a Mimi by saying, “I don’t know him.”

And back to the peen coffin. I Googled “penis coffin” and this came up. Now I know what I want to be buried in.

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